A crimson betrayal too deep to numb
by Angel408
Summary: rated 4 talk of depression,suicide and cutting.When Tai and Kari were small their parents got divorced.Their dad left with their sister,Jesse.Jesse's a digidestined and all she wants is to get to know her siblings. COMPLETE
1. Introduction

OK time for some explaining! When Kari was 4 and Tai was 6 their parents got divorced. Their mom took Tai and Kari and stayed in Japan. Their dad moved to America with their 3 yr. old sister, Jesse. Their parents divorced ended badly so they never heard or spoke to Jesse or their father.(Or so Tai and Kari thought). About a year later their mom got remarried to a man named Kai. They started calling him dad and everything. Jesse and their father was rarely brought up in their conversations. Nobody talks about it.

Jesse grew up with her father in New York. About 3 years after the divorce (Jesse was 6) her father remarried a lady named Elizabeth. She had a 4 yr. old son from a previous marriage. Jesse grew up hating her mom. She believes its her fault that her parents divorced. After spending years trying to get in-touch with her mom and siblings only to be shunned Jesse became cold and hateful towards them (or at least her mom.) Jesse wants to go back to Japan and see her siblings so bad that being shunned by her own mother has caused her to become depressed and even suicidal.

Jesse's also a Digidestined. Her digimon's name is Cubmon. ( He looks like a lion cub, duh.) OK Now lets get on with the story.

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"Come on...Pick up," A girl said into the phone as it rang for the 7th time.

"Hi you've reached the Kamiya residence Please leave a message after the bee..." Jesse hung up the phone in annoyance. 'Why don't they ever answer' she thought to herself, 'I've been trying for 5 years now.'

"Who were you trying to call?" A women in her last thirties with long blond hair and blue eyes asked as she looked at Jesse.

"Nobody," Jesse said coldly as she walked away into her room. She didn't want to be mean but that woman was way too nosy. Jesse fell onto her bed with a soft thud. 'Why does she hate me? What did I do to her? Maybe she doesn't want me to ruin her perfect life.' Jess thought bitterly as she thought about her mom, 'its not like I want to barge in on her life, I just want to get to know them again...Even if it's just a little bit.'

She remember when her father told her that her mother was getting remarried and then later when he got remarried. Those, in a way, were the worst days of her life. It ruined any chance of her parents getting back together...though she didn't expect them to anyways it was just wishful thinking.

" Jesse get down here," She heard her father yell from downstairs. She let out a sigh and walked down the steps. She already knew what he wanted. He wanted to talk about her day and how she was feeling. A year ago he could careless but after she almost killed herself, he, all of a sudden, wanted to talk with her and be with her and now its she could careless.

" What?" She said annoyed as she walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table.

He looked at her and shook his head. She knew what he was thinking. He hated the way she dressed. Black shirts with long baggy black pants with chains hanging off them. Her black hair and eyes probably made it look worse in her dad's eyes she figured, but that's what she wore and her "shrink" told him she's trying to express herself and let her be. Her shrink need to tighten a few screws she had loose in her head if ya know what I mean.

" How was your day," He asked cheerfully.

" Like yesterday." She said curtly.

" And that was..."

" Same shit different day." She said just to piss him off.

Her father took a deep breathe " Ok, Jesse, what is bothering you. Huh? Tell me, I sick of you sassing off."

Jesse looked down and said nothing for a minute "...I tried to call mom today." She whispered.

Tom, her father, looked at her, " Oh god" he said quietly, "What did she say?"

" I got the damn answering machine...AGAIN! Why does she hate me dad? I don't want to ruin her life or anything I just want to talk to Tai or Kari. I just want to know that they still know I'm alive." She didn't cry or anything...She wore a blank look on her face. Elizabeth got up to hug her but Jesse pushed her away.

" Stay away from me." she said coldly, " Just stay away." with that she ran up into her room and laid on her bed. She curled herself up in a ball and fell asleep.

When she woke up it was about 2 in the morning. She let out a groaned and got up. She walked over to her computer and turned it on. She opened up her drawer and pulled out a digivice.

"Digiport open," She said quietly as she was sucked into the computer. She looked around the digital world. Jesse took a deep breathe and smirked. She loved the digital world it was her sanctuary from the hardships of home.

"Cubmon!" She yelled. 'Cubmon' she thought 'her only true friend. All her other friends left her when she became depressed and tried to kill herself.'

"Hey Jesse," she heard Cubmon yell behind her.

"Hey buddy, what's up?" She said.

"Bored like usual. Its so boring without you here, can't you stay or can't I come home with you?"

" Yeah if you want my dad to freak. Elizabeth would have a heart attack. Actually Elizabeth having a heart attack doesn't sound like a bad idea."

" Yeah I guess your right. Not about the Elizabeth thing though that's just mean."

Jesse shrugged with a little smirk on her face. " Hey, there's more of those black towers." Jesse said quietly. She was looking at a control spire. (This takes place after the Digidestined get Ken to be on their side.)

" Lets destroy it," Cubmon said enthusiastically.

"Sure," She shrugged rubbing her arm.

Cubmon looked at her and shivered. Every time he looks at her arm he sees the scars from when she use to cut herself. He shook his head.

" Lets do it."

'Cubmon digivolve to...Lewmon.'

" Lion Claw!" Lewmon said as he destroyed the spiral. He de-digivolved back into Cubmon.

" Jesse, do you hear voices?" Cubmon asked quietly.

Jesse listened for a few seconds before answering, " Yeah I think I do...Hide!"

They climbed up a tree and sat on its branches. In a few minutes a group of kids were walking their way. Jesse's eyes widen she never saw any other humans here before.

" Hey look the control spires are already gone." A boy with brown hair and goggles said.

" I don't remember destroying these ones." A another boy, who was way shorter and looked a lot younger than the rest said.

" I don't think we did." A girl with brown hair and a camera around her neck responded looking around.

" I agree with Kari." A boy with long bluish hair said, " We didn't destroy these ones."

Jesse's eyes widened when they said the girls name. 'no' she thought ' It's a different Kari.'

"Who destroyed it, then?" A girl with long hair and glasses questioned.

" Maybe a digimon," A boy with blond hair answered uncertain.

" Who cares?" said goggle boy, " it's gone and that's the important thing."

" I agree with Davis," said the blue haired boy.

"Yeah but what if it was something we should be worried about, Ken." Said the short boy.

" I agree with Cody on this one, guys." Said Blondie.

"But its has to be something that's here to help up otherwise it wouldn't have destroyed it, TK. Don't you agree, Yolie?" Said Kari.

" Yeah, I guess so. Lets just continue on, I mean, there's a lot more control spire's that need to be destroyed."

" Ok then." Said one of the digimon, "Lets go."

After they walked away Jesse jumped down from the tree.

" Do you think they're also Digidestined?" Cubmon asked.

" Yeah, why else would they be here." Jesse answered.

" I guess," Cubmon agreed.

" Anyways I better be getting home. My dad is probably up and if he finds me gone I'm dead meat. Bye Cubmon see you later."

A few minutes later she was back in her bedroom and it was about 6 o'clock in the morning. Jesse let out a sigh and fell onto her bed and went to sleep.

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OK There's the first chapter please R&R. I need to know what you think of the story.

-Angel408 


	2. You dont want a friend like me

I decided to write the next chapter to this story...Yep! I apologize for misspelled words my Microsoft Works sucks at spell check. I want to kill it but I can't so what'cha gonna do about it. I'm going to try make Jesse a little more depressed 'cause when I re-read the story the next morning (I wrote it at midnight) she didn't seem that depressed or anything so I have a few things I need to work on and I'll try to work on them. I promise! Just tell me what needs to be changed. 

I had a friend ask me why Jesse sleeps a lot in the first chapter. So if anybody else is wondering it's because people who are depressed have a change in sleeping patterns, such as difficulty sleeping, early morning awakening, or sleeping too much and Jesse one of the people who sleep a lot during the day and tends to wake up several times at night and can't get back to sleep. Anyways your probably sick of me talking so I'll shut-up.

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"Jesse, are you up?" Jesse faintly heard a voice from downstairs yelling. Still wanting to sleep, she rolled over and pulled the covers over her head. 'Go away' she thought.

"Jesse, get your butt up right now!" Tom yelled as he knocked on her door.

Jesse groaned and threw off the covers. 'Fine you win' Jesse got up slowly. She was too exhausted to jump out of bed. After sitting on her bed for about 5 minutes she looked at her clock. It read 10:45 am. She finally got out of bed and switched clothes. (she fell asleep with yesterday's clothes on.) Her pulled on a black t-shirt then put a baggy, black sweatshirt on over it. She just left yesterday's pants on she was too tired to change them.

"Jesse! Get up now!" Her father yelled the other side of her door.

"You can shut-up now I'm up!" She said as she opened the door and walked out. She walked past her father and down the stairs. Jesse walked into the kitchen and grabbed a piece of toast and sat down. She looked across the table to see her stepbrother, Max, staring at her.

"What?"

"Nothing, I didn't say anything."

"Whatever." She muttered. Max continued to stare at her, "Stop staring at me, damn it!"

"Mom! Jesse swore at me!" He yelled extremely loud.

Jesse put her hand to her head, she could feel a headache coming on., "Shut up you little shit. You swear all the time."

"Jesse! You watch your mouth this instant." Elizabeth said sternly as she walked into the kitchen.

Jesse rolled her eyes and got up. "I'm done" She said as she walked out of the kitchen and out of the house. 'They hate me, too' She thought 'Everybody hates me. They all wish I'd just disappear and never turn. If I died they would be happy. They wouldn't have to worry about me anymore. Then mom wouldn't have to worry about her "daughter" calling and ruining her life.'

Jesse sat on a bench in the local park and thought about what happened in the digital world. 'Who were those kids' She thought 'What if that really was my sister Kari. I find that impossible but...damn it here I go again with that wishful thinking. It's not her. Is there more Digidestined? If there are maybe I should join up with them. No I can't do that. I only cause pain to the people around me. Plus they might start asking question about me.' She ended that trail of thought as she rolled up her sleeves a little and looked at her wrists.

5 months ago she tried to slit her wrists and commit suicide. Max found her in her room and she managed to live through it. The hospital told her parents that they also found scars on her arms probably from cutting herself. Her family was torn and almost afraid of her. Max is still afraid to talk to her. When she looks in his eyes she can see the confusion in them like he was silently asking why? She wanted so bad to answer his question but she first had to find the answer. She didn't know and that was frustrating.

She let out a sigh and got up. It was about 1 o'clock when she finally got back home.

"Where were you?" Her father asked/yelled as she walked through the door.

"At the park," She answered her voice flat and emotionless.

Her father held out his hand and she knew what he wanted. She rolled up her sleeves and showed him her arms. He thinks she'll start to cut herself again. 'Like I don't have enough scars' she thought bitterly 'they still don't trust me.' When he was sure she didn't do anything to herself did he walk away. Jesse rolled her sleeves back down and walked to her room. She laid down and back to sleep she went.

She woke up around midnight this time. She yawned and got up. She silently walked to the kitchen and grabbed a pop. She walked back to her room and decided to go to the digital world.

Within seconds she was back in the digital world and Cubmon was at her side. She yawned again.

"Are you tired?" Cubmon asked as they walked through a desert.

"No," She lied, "I'm fine."

Cubmon rolled his eyes, he obviously didn't believe her. 'Great not even Cubmon trusts me' She thought sadly.

She looked up ahead and saw a woman walking towards her and Cubmon. As they got closer to her Jesse realized that she wasn't a human but some sort of digimon. She had a mummy looking digimon with her. Cubmon growled a warning.

"Well, Well, Well who do we have here? Another one of the Digidestined." Arukenimon taunted.

"Yeah another one of those pesky Digidestined. What are we going to do with her Arukenimon?" asked Mummymon.

"Quiet fool," She replied then saying to Jesse, "Who might you be?"

"What's it to ya, bitch." Jesse answered coldly.

"Don not talk to Arukenimon like that. Do you value your life, girl?" Mummymon said raising his voice.

"No, not really," Jesse said casually with a smirk on her face. "Lets go Cubmon they're not worth our time."

"Oh no little girl your not worth ours." And with that Arukenimon and Mummymon turned around and walked way.

"Wow great come back," Jesse muttered sarcastically, "Come on Cubmon, before they decide to come back." They continued to walk in the desert.

-Else Where-

"How long do we have to walk in this freakin desert!" Davis said as the gang (both 1st and 2nd season kids are there) continued to walk for what seems like forever.

"Quit complaining Davis, sheesh, your like a baby" Yolie said.

As Yolie and Davis continued to throw insults at each other T.K looked over at Kari and saw her holding something in her hand, " Hey Kari what do you have in your hand?"

"Oh this, its a picture of my family when I was little." Kari replied holding out the picture for everyone to see.

Everybody looked at the picture for a minute before Matt asked, "Who's the other girl and that man?"

"That's our dad and our little sister Jesse. They live in America," Tai answered.

"Dad? That doesn't look like your dad and I didn't know you had another sister. I'm confused." Said Davis. (A/N Aren't you always.)

"When we were little my parents got divorced and my dad left for America with my little sister. My mom got remarried, obviously. We never heard from our sister or father again. (There mom is keeping secrets.) I was digging through our picture box when I found this picture." Kari said.

"Oh how come you never brought this up before," Asked Sora.

"I guess we just never saw the point. I barely remember her and dad." Said Tai shrugging. He had a look that said drop it.

"Oh I see." Cody said carefully, " Do you miss her?"

"Yeah, kind of...I mean I don't remember her but when I think about them I feel this empty feeling in my heart like I'm missing something." Kari replied sadly.

Everyone nodded. They walked in silence for a few minutes before they saw something up ahead.

"What's that?" Gatomon (sp?) asked pointing up ahead .  
"I think...I think its a person!" replied Palmon.

"Hey! Who are you?" Davis yelled as they got nearer.

With Jesse-

"Are those people up ahead?" Jesse asked almost fearfully.

"Yeah," Cubmon replied.

Jesse wanted to run when she heard somebody yell "Hey who are you?" 'Damn they know I'm here.' Jesse stopped and waited for them to come to her.

"Hi!" Davis said when they were in front of Jesse, "I'm Davis and this is Matt, T.K, Sora, Mimi, Joe, Izzy, Cody, Yolie, Ken, Tai, and Kari." ( I think that's everybody) Davis said as he pointed to everybody.

Jesse looked at them blankly. 'Have enough sugar, boy' She thought. She noticed they were staring at her clothes. The all black clothes with the black hair and eyes doesn't make her look friendly. She was looking at Tai and Kari. 'That's them' she thought 'I can just feel it.'

"Hi," Jesse said quietly, "My name is Jesse and this is Cubmon."

"Are you Japanese 'cause you look it," Davis said cheerfully.

Before she could answer T.K said "Ignore Davis he's annoying and kind of nosy."

Jesse nodded she didn't smile or anything. "That's ok. I live in America but yes I am Japanese."

"I have a sister with the same name as you. She also lives in America." Tai said smiling, "What part of America are you from?"

"New York," She answered flatly. (is that even a word)

"Why are you here?" Ken said suspiciously, "I didn't know there were other Digidestined."

"You are a Digidestined, right?" Mimi asked.

"Yes."

'She doesn't talk much' Tai thought.

"Oh that's cool," Mimi said.

"I have to go," She said walking away.

"Hey! Wait! Why don't you join up with us? We could be friends!" Davis yelled as she walked away.

Jesse turned and looked at them, " You don't want a friend like me." And with that she walked away and returned home.

'That was Tai and Kari, That was Tai and Kari!' She kept repeating over and over in her head. It was about 5:30 in the morning. She laid down and fell asleep.

-Digital world with the Digidestined after Jesse left-

"What did she mean by that?" Davis questioned.

"Davis you can't expect everybody to want to be our friends," Ken replied rolling his eyes, "Anyways I don't like her. I sense something not right about her like a dark aura or something. Maybe we're better off not having her around."

"Ah Ken your suspicious about everyone. She can't be that bad. Maybe she just doesn't have any friends or maybe she's just shy." Davis said coming up with, to him, a reasonable answer.

They all looked at Davis like he was nuts. "She would have said that if she was just shy," Sora reasoned.

"Just drop it," Matt said getting sick of their arguing.

"Lets just go back home," Tai said agreeing with Matt.


	3. The letter

I'm going to need a few more reviews in order for me to continue this story but I'll write one more chapter for the heck of it. 

Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon (no really)

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Jesse woke up with a jolt. How long has she been asleep. It was around 3:30 in the afternoon. 'What nobody bothered to wake me up, that's wonderful' she thought as she walked down stairs to see where everyone was. She didn't see anyone. 'That's weird' She muttered quietly. She was about to call her dad's cell phone when she saw a note on the fridge.

Me and Dad went out with the neighbors, took Max with us, noticed you were sleeping didn't want to wake you. Be back around 10 tonight.

"Wonderful," She said to nobody. 'What to do, What to do' She thought as she looked around. She didn't want to go to the digital world 'cause Cubmon had to sleep sometime. She decided to eat some lunch so set out to do that.

-Tai's house-

Its around 9:30 am at Tai and Kari's house and all the digidestines just slept over. They were digging through the Kamiya's photo albums.

"Hey I found another one of your sister...umm..." Davis said holding a picture as if it was a prize.

"Jesse," Kari finished for him rolling her eyes.

"Yeah that's it," Davis said.

Everyone looked at him for a moment before shaking their heads.

Yolie studied the picture. It showed a little black haired girl with a big smile on her face. In the middle was Tai, even then he had wild hair. Next to Tai was Kari. All three had their arms around each other and were smiling. 'They seemed really happy' Yolie thought as she looked at another one only it had their parents in the picture, too. Their mom was holding Jesse and their dad was holding Kari as Tai sat on the ground in front of them.

"Hey Kari have you ever tried to talk to Jesse." Yolie said suddenly.

Kari looked at Yolie obviously startled. "Well...Umm...No not at all. They've never tried to contact us so we just left it alone. It's sad really if they tried to contact us we could have stayed in touch." Kari finished looking down at the picture Yolie just had.

"Oh..." Was all Yolie could say.

"Hey Kari, look what I found!" Tai said coming out of their parent's closet.

"What were you doing in there!" Kari asked ", You know we shouldn't be snooping in their closet."

"Yeah well I was seeing if we dropped any pictures when I found this box. There are pictures of us in there when Jesse lived with us." Tai explained (sort of) as he set the box down in front of them.

Tai opened it and took out the first picture. All the pictures were embarrassing baby moments. Them in the bathtub, them eating like pigs, them after rolling in the mud.

"Cute," Sora squealed as they saw one of Tai "helping" his mom in their mini-garden. Tai just rolled his eyes. He was about to make some comment when he saw a piece of paper. He picked it up. He started to read it, his eyes widen.

"What is it?" Kari questioned as she saw her brother's face.

"Listen to this. Dear family, How are you. It's been weeks and we haven't heard anything from you. I'm going to give you our phone number just in case you need it. It's on the bottom of the paper. How are the kids? Jesse is missing them terribly. Maybe you can find it in your heart to let her come visit you or let them come visit me. I'll be in touch. Love Dad/Tom." Tai looked down as he finished the letter.

Kari picked up another one and began to read it out loud ", Dear family, It's been two years and we still haven't heard from you. I think I'm starting to get. Fine I'll stay out of your life but please don't punish Jesse by keeping the kids away from her. She needs to see her siblings. Please, I beg you, Let her see them or at least answer our calls. From Tom.

There was three letters left. Tai picked up the next one. ", Dear anyone who's reading this. Fine I get it we'll leave you alone including Jesse. You obviously don't care about your daughter enough to answer back. I thought you'd have some decency to answer at least one of them but no, not you. After dozens of calls and letters I've decided to stop. This is our last letter. Have a great life... Sincerely Tom."

A tear rolled down Kari's cheek but she picked up the next one anyways. "Dear Kamiya family, I know I said I wouldn't write to you again but I thought you'd like to know. Jesse is in the hospital. She slit her writs in an attempt to commit suicide. She's alive and stable. Though she's alive physically the doctors are saying emotionally she's dead. Please write a letter to Jesse letting her know you care or, even better, visit we'd be happy to have you. Jesse needs you please don't ignore us...Signed Tom."

Kari was crying now "Why didn't she tell us! Why?"

Tai picked up the last letter and began to read in a shaky voice "; dear I don't give a shit, Great to know you care. I thought I would write to let you know how Jesse's doing though you obviously you don't care from the lack of letter or phone call or anything! Your daughter tried to kill herself and yet, you refuse to send us one little letter. That's low. I hope you never write back you heartless bitch. Hope you have a fun stay in hell...Signed Tom."

Nobody spoke; nobody knew what to do.

"So the truth comes out" Tai said ", After all these years we find out we were the ones doing the ignoring. Well I'm ending it." With that Tai shifted through the letters and picked up the one with the phone number on it. "Hopefully the haven't moved."

Kari looked at Tai before smiling. "Let's do it. Let's call her."

All the other digidestines agreed. Tai came back with the phone and sat down. He took a deep breath before dialing the number.

"Hello, Can I ask whom I'm speaking to?" Tai said as a girl picked up the phone. "Hey Jesse its Tai, your brother."

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I'll write the next chapter as soon as I get some reviews meaning more than 1. Oh and don't write to me telling me you don't like my story because of who I put in it and crap 'cause truthfully I don't care


	4. The phone call

I don't know why I'm writing another chapter but I am so there...I hope somebody will review to this story 'cause i personally think this is my best story so yeah... 

Italic means voice over the phone...duh.

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Jesse was sitting in the kitchen staring out the window when she heard the phone ring. She walked over to it and reads the caller ID and mumbles 'who the hell.'

"Hello Toki residence," Jesse said politely

_"Hello, Can I ask whom I'm speaking to?"_

"Jesse, Who is this?" Jesse said annoyed. Sounded like another annoying snooty voice.

_"Hey Jesse its Tai, your brother."_

Jesse stopped breathing. 'This is a dream' she thought 'There is no way my brother is calling me. It's not possible after the years of being ignored I'm finally being answered...There's no way heaven is being that nice to me.' (A/N Just to let you know Tai put her on speaker phone while she was 'daydreaming.')

"Is this some kind of a joke. If this is one of Max's friends you guys are so dead." Jesse said still in shock.

_"No, no joke its really Tai and Kari's here, too. We just found some letters dad wrote to us. We decided to answer them since mom wouldn't."_

"So you thought you would call to make up for mom's absents if you will and that would make everything better. Let me tell you something Tai, for the last 5 years of my life I've been trying to get you guys to at least talk to me. I don't know what I was thinking, I don't care anymore. Don't call again, Tai, I don't need your pity."

_"Why would we pity you, Jess?"_

"Don't call me that! You don't deserve to call me that, you're a stranger to me, Tai. You said you read those letters I assume you read the ones about me in the hospital. Like I said I don't need your pity."

_"Jesse,"_ Kari's voice rang over the phone, _"It's not our fault. We didn't know mom was keeping this from us. We had no clue."_

"Don't give me that, didn't you ever question. Didn't you ever wonder why your father wouldn't call? I wondered every day why mom hated me. I tried to call and you guys never even looked my way. I hate you!" With that Jesse hung up and ran upstairs.

-Tai's house-

Tai clicked the off button on the phone and looked at everyone.

"We should have expected that you know." Said Kari, " Who would let somebody in after years of being ignored? We weren't being fair in assuming we'd welcomed with open arms."

"You know what they say about assuming it makes an ass out of you and me." Davis said trying to lighten the mood. It didn't help.

"Maybe we should try again later and see if we could talk to dad," Tai said.

"Why would you do that?" A voice came from the doorway.

"Mom you're home early,"

"Why would you want to contact a man who ignored you your whole life?"

"Give it up mom, we know" Kari said holding up the notes dad had sent them.

-Jesse's house-

'Damn it' She mentally yelled 'Why did I do that. Am I that much of a monster? I finally got my chance and I blew it! But I can't help but feel that I had a reason to do that. Now maybe they will feel my pain. But I don't want them to feel my pain, nobody should have to live with that. I'm so confused.' Jesse's thoughts were spinning in her head.

'Maybe I could start over' She thought 'But how...The digital world, of course, I could see them while I'm there and one day I'll be able to approach them and we could be a family again.'

-Tai's house-

"How? Why?"

"Mom, that wasn't fair. We should be asking you why. Why did you not tell us?"

"I was afraid that you would want to live with your dad and leave me all alone."

"That's not good enough, your acting like a kid you should have known better." Kari said obviously hurt.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry" Their mom said as she fell to the floor crying.

"It's ok." Tai said hugging his mom "it's ok, but we want to meet her."

Their mom looked at them quietly. "Ok" She finally said sighing. "I'll talk to your father."

"No" Tai said "We are going to do this. Jesse's been trying for years and know we're going to try. Don't worry mom, we'll never leave you."

With that said the group went to the digital world to talk about their plan without any adults interfering. What they didn't know is, on the other side of the world, Jesse was doing the exact same thing.

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All I have to say is push the little review button you can do it.


	5. Annoying questions

I'm already on chapter 5 of this story I cant believe. Thanks to anyone and everyone who reviewed. 

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--Jesse-

"Digiport open!" Jesse yelled as she went pointed her digivice at the computer. She looked around the digital world for Cubmon.

"Hey Jesse...right." Jesse turned around to see Davis and the rest of the gang running towards her.

"Hello," She said quietly. She smiled lightly when Cubmon came running over to her as well.

"Hi Jesse sorry I'm late."

"That's ok."

"Its great to see you again." Yolie said looking at Jesse trying to be polite.

"Why do you talk to me?"

"What do you mean? We want to be your friend." Tai said.

"I told you, you don't want me for a friend. I'm trouble."

"Believe me if your a Digidestined and your in the digital world, you're always trouble." Davis said trying to lighten the mood.

"Sure whatever." With that Jesse started to walk away with Cubmon in her arms. Davis caught up to her with ease. "Why are you following me?"

"We told you, we want to be your friends."

Jesse opened her mouth to reply before shutting it. 'This is my chance to get to know them again. We could be a family.' She thought before saying, "Fine."

Davis looked surprised. He smiled brightly "Great, I promise you wont regret it."

"Yes but I have a feeling you will." She said quietly looking down. They sat down under a huge tree.

"If that's ok with you we're going to get to know each other better by asking questions."

"Ok."

"How old are you?"

"Fourteen, how about you guys?"

"Cody's 14 as well. Kari, T.K, Me, Yolie, and Ken are 15. Mimi is 16. Matt, Sora, Izzy, and Tai are 17. Joe is 18. Got all that." Davis said.

"Yeah."

"Do you speak Japanese?" Joe asked.

"Hai." she replied sort of smiling.

"How long have you been coming to the digital world?" Yolie asked.

"I don't know….a year maybe less."

"What's your family like?" T.K asked.

"...I don't want to talk about it."

"Oh, sorry." T.K said.

"Its fine."

"Why do you wear long sleeves?" Asked Patamon.

"Don't ask." Jesse was starting to get irritated with the questions. They were getting to personal.

"Well I think we bothered you with enough questions of one day. How about we go destroy some control spire? (A/N-Whatever they are)

"Fine."

They walked around for awhile and found a huge area covered with them.  
"Cubmon digivolve to...Lewmon."

Everyone else followed by digivolving. Within a few minutes all the towered were destroyed.

"That was excellent!" Davis yelled.

"Sure..." Jesse said kind of freaked out. Davis was just way to happy for her liking. Though she wished she could have his free spirit.

"I better go home. My father is probably worried." Jesse said in a dead sort of way. Jesse left right after saying that.

"I'm sorry but she gives me the creeps sometimes." Sora said after Jesse left.

"I still wonder why she wears long sleeves." Patamon said.

"Maybe its cold in America..."Tai said reasonably.

"I guess."

"What are we going to do about my sister Jesse?" Kari asked.

"Lets call your dad's house and see if he answers maybe you could talk to him." Cody said.

"That seems to be our best option right now." Tai said.

They all headed back to the human world to call Tai's dad.

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Next chapter- How will their dad react the them calling? Will they get the answers for getting close to their sister, Jesse? Will Patamon find out why she wears long sleeves all the time? All of this might be answered in the next chapter. Don't forget to review! Sorry for the shorter chapter.


	6. Scars

I have come back to finally update this story! It finally has a title, (has a heart attack) though I'm not sure that its a very good one...Anyways now for the freaky row of eights to show when the chapter begins!

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-At Tai's-

"Here's the number," Tai said handing it to Kari so that she could dial it.

"I'm surprised mom didn't hide it," Kari mumbled angrily. Kari dialed the number and waited for someone to pick up. She put the phone on speaker again.

"I hope Dad picks up because I don't think Jesse's gonna give us a chance."

"Hello," Came a feminine voice.

"Uh...Hello? Is...Tom there?" Kari asked probably sounding like an idiot.

"Yes, he is, Just a moment." Kari looked at Tai as if to ask 'who is that?'

"Hello Tom speaking." A male voice said.

Nobody spoke for a minute. They weren't sure what to say. "Um...Hi. This is Tai and Kari, you know your kids."

"Tai? Kari? Is it really you? Its been years! How come you never answered my letters?"

"We didn't know about them. Mom hid them from us. We found them today and called Jesse. I think we shocked her so bad that she got mad at us. She did have a good reason though." Tai explained to the man he hasn't seen in years.

"I see. So you read the letters? All of them?"

"Yes, all of them. Even the one about Jesse being hospitalized. I wish we could have prevented that."

"It's in the past, at least you're trying to fix it now."

"How can we help her now? She doesn't want to talk to us."

"Keep trying to call. That's what she did. Write letters and e-mails. Get her to listen. Don't do this just Jesse, do it for me as well. I can't stand to see her like this. Her e-mail address is darkangel4002000 at yahoo dot com it wont let you down." Tom said smiling.

"I have one question," Tai said, "Who's the woman that answered the phone?"

"Oh that's Elizabeth, my wife. I got married a long time ago. She has a son named Max."

"Oh that's what Jesse meant when she said "This better not be one of Max's friends." Tai realized.

"Exactly," Tom confirmed, "The only thing is I don't think Jesse likes Max or Elizabeth all that much. She's so wrapped up in that shell of hers. Anyways if that's all you had to say, I have to go. I hope you will call again just to talk. Its great to hear from you guys."

"We'll call back we promise, Bye," They both said as they hung up the phone.

"What should we do know?" Davis asked.

"Its like 11:00 at night I think you should leave." Tai announced. (10:00 am in New York, I think.)

"Hehe, Oh yeah." Davis said as everyone left.

"See you tomorrow, Kari."

"Good-night, Tai."

-At Jesse's-

'I wonder who dad was talking to,' Jesse thought as she walked into the kitchen.

"Hi Honey, Want some breakfast?" Elizabeth said enthusiastically. It was 10 in the morning.

"No, I don't and don't call me Honey. I'm not your daughter." Jesse snapped. She hated when Elizabeth acted like her mother. Elizabeth looked really hurt, but Jesse didn't care.

"Jesse, behave yourself." Her father said coming into the kitchen as well. He looked kind of happy.

'I don't want to know,' Jesse thought. Sometimes it hurts to see people around her happy when she's hurting.

"I'm going out for awhile."

"No you don't," Tom announced, "We're leaving and you need to watch Max."

"Dad, Max is 12. He can take care of himself."

"I know. Then maybe I want him to baby-sit you."

"Thanks I feel so trusted. I'm going to bed."

-2:30 am at Jesse's house- (A/n…she was asleep of over 12 hours!)

Jesse's mental alarm clock woke her up. She walked over the computer and went to the Digital world.

"Hey Jesse you're here." A voice shouted. Jesse looked to find Davis and company coming over to her. She quickly calculated the time in Japan. Hmm...It would be about 3:30 pm. Yep that's why they're here.

"Yeah I'm here."

"What are you doing up? Its like 2:30 in the morning in America." T.K asked astonished.

"I'm a morning person," Jesse smirked. More like a sleep-aholic, who gets up at odd hours of the night.

Davis laughed at her 'joke.' "Nah, she just comes here at this time 'cause she knows we'll be here."

"Yeah that's it," Jesse agreed rolling her eyes.

Matt laughed. Yolie looked at her 'Take about mood-swings. One day she can be pretty nice and then others she can be a really creep.' She thought.

"Hey where's Cubmon?" Agumon asked.

"I don't know. He'll be here. He always seems to know where I am." Right on cue, Cubmon came running over.

"Hi Jesse, sorry I'm late I was on the other side of this island." Cubmon apologized.

"Don't worry about it. It's not your fault." Jesse assured.

"Hey Jesse," Patamon started, "I noticed you're wearing a long sleeve shirt again, Is it winter in America?"

"No, its summer." She informed him.

"Then why the long sleeves?"

"I like long sleeves," Was the only answer she gave him. Patamon shrugged. He definitely didn't want to bug her.

Later on as they were walking, Patamon looked over to see Jesse itching her arm and he noticed scars on her wrists. Not just one or two but like ten. Just on that one arm! He wanted to ask but he thought that would be rude, so he kept quiet.

After Jesse left Patamon asked the Digidestined a question.

"Do a lot of people have scars on their arms?" Patamon asked.

"Well sometimes, Why?" T.K asked.

"Jesse had a whole bunch of scars on her arm." Patamon replied. They all looked at each other.

"Do you think she's a cutter?" T.K asked everyone else. They all shrugged.

"Maybe we should ask her..." Yolie suggested.

"We will next time." T.K announced.

"Next time...?" They all asked.

"Yep its the end of this chapter so next time." T.K replied.

"Oh..."

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Review Please...Sorry if this chapter was stupid...I'm building it up. Will They ask Jesse about her scars? If they do what will she say? I don't even know! lol 


	7. To live or die

Sorry its taken me forever to update this story, I've been busy working on my other ones. I'm hoping that this story will get more reviews but you know what they say beggars can't be choosers...or at least my dad says that...NEwayz, here's the next chapter sorry if it's short. 

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It was 7:00 o'clock in the evening when Jesse woke up to her computer going "You got mail," over and over again. Sometimes she really hated her computer, it was so damn annoying! She groaned as she got up to finally shut it up. She clicked on the e-mail.

Dear Jesse,  
We are writing to you to beg you to give us another chance. We are sorry if we hurt you and we-

Jesse stopped reading. She clicked the delete button in the corner, she didn't even want to finish it. 'How did they get my e-mail address...' She thought. Suddenly she remembered her dad walking in the kitchen all happy. They must have called him and now they were all conspiring against her. In anger, Jesse walked out of her room and downstairs.

"Dad!" Jesse yelled coming into their living room.

"Yes honey," Tom asked looking up from his newspaper at her.

"Don't you "honey" me. I can't believe you! You gave them my e-mail address. How could you do that!"

"What?"

"Don't pretend that you don't know. I just got an e-mail from my so-called siblings in Japan. You're the only person who knows my e-mail address. Why did you give it to them?"

"Jess, try to understand. I just want what's best for you and I thought you wanted to get to know your brother and sister again. I didn't think it was that big of a deal."

"You want what's best for me? A little late, dad. Scars don't heal. Where were you a year ago, when my depression started to control my life. Where were you when I tried to kill myself. Oh that's right, you were at work, you're always at work!"

"Jesse, you're not being fair."

"Not being fair, Not being FAIR! You wanna know what's 'not being fair' dad. Its not fair that I never got to see my mom again, that she doesn't want me. Its not fair that my dad got re-married to some strange woman without asking me how I felt about it. Its not fair that I had to watch over Max while you went out and had fun. Its not fair that you worked all day since I was 8 and I never saw you. Its not fair that since I was 12 years old for reasons I don't know I wanted to die." Jesse was crying by this point, "Its not fair...Its not fair that my own father can't trust me anymore. The worst part is I don't think he should trust me ever again."

"Oh Jesse..." Tom reached for her. He wanted to give her a much need hug, but she backed away from him.

"Don't touch me," Jesse whispered before yelling, "Don't touch me. You betrayed me!" Jesse turned around and ran out of the room. She ran upstairs and into the digital world. When She appeared in the digital world she was standing on a cliff. She was still sobbing.

"He doesn't trust me," She screamed, "Its not fair!" Before she could stop herself or get back into the right mind to figure out what she was doing she took out a knife and rolled up her sleeve.

"He hates me, He doesn't trust me, He betrayed me, He HATES ME!" With each word she made a slice into her skin. She looked at he 13 new cuts into her arms, 7 in one arm and 6 in the other, and let out a soft shout.

"What did I do, What did I do?" She cried, "No wonder he can't trust me, I can't trust me." She curled up in a fetal position by the cliff. That's how Cubmon found her.

"Jesse, Jesse get up. Please Jesse get up." Cubmon looked at his friend. What was wrong with her? Then he saw her arms, he frantically shouted, "Jesse, you have to get up! Please don't go to sleep on me, Please!" His shouts were in vain. She didn't move an inch.  
Cubmon needed to find help and quick. The other Digidestined, that's it. He dug in Jesse's pocket and got her digivice. He looked at the map and was relieved to see 8 dots on it. Some of the other Digidestined were here.

"Jesse, I'll be right back, ok, I'm getting help." Cubmon said reassuringly as he ran towards the dots on the screen.

-Jesse's Mind-

'Cubmon come back! Oh even he left me when he saw what I did.' Jesse looked around, 'Where am I?'

_Safe_

'Who are you?'

_I'm you._

'You're me but how is that possible.'

_I'm a different part of you._

'Oh, where am I?'

_I told you, you're safe. You don't have to worry about anything anymore. No more hate, or pain._

'No more hate or pain, that sounds nice. No more me sounds better though, I only bring pain. Look even Cubmon is walking away from me now.' Jesse felt faint.

_Sleep my child it was all be better soon._

'Sleep...Yeah that sounds good, I'll...just...sleep.'

-With Cubmon-

"Hey Digidestined!" Cubmon yelled frantically.

Davis, Yolie, Ken, Tai, Kari, Cody, T.K, and Joe all looked up.

"Hey Cubmon," Davis said as he approached, "Where's Jesse."

"You have to help me or I mean you have to help Jesse. She's, She's...hurt." Cubmon finished. He didn't know how to explain it to them.

"Hurt herself? How?"

"Jesse's...Jesse's...Oh we're wasting time! You have to come with me."

He began to run and to his relief they followed him. When they approached the cliff, they stopped. All they saw was small pool of blood, some of those cuts were deeper than Cubmon thought.

"What happened?" Joe asked immediately approaching Jesse.

"Jesse's a cutter. She's suicidal or at least she was but she got help. Something must have set her off if she did this to herself."

'Wait,' Kari thought, 'Her name is Jesse, like my sister. She cuts, is suicidal just like my sister. It cant be!'

"We have to wake her up. She's half awake now but she needs to keep awake if she wants to live." Joe said urgently.

"That's just the thing...If she wants to live. Jesse might not want to live." Cubmon said quietly.

"We have to try anyways," Davis announced, "I said I wanted to be her friend and I'm going to stick by that. I wont let her die."

-Jesse's mind-

'They want to be my friends even after the cutting. How could they I don't even know them, My father couldn't even look at me after he found out.'

_Ignore them, Jesse, you need to sleep._

I don't want to sleep. If they wont give up on me I can't give up on me.'

_damn it!_

-End Jesse's mind-

Joe and Davis were wrapping up Jesse's arms as everyone else stood silently. Would Jesse wake up? That was the question on everyone's mind.

"Hey Tai," Kari said quietly.

"Yeah?"

"I think that's our sister."

"What?"

Everyone looked at Kari.

"I'm don't know how exactly I know this but I know, she's our sister. Its just a feeling." Kari explained.

"Everything seems to fit. They're from the same area, the same name, the same...Problem..." Tai agreed.

"We finally found her."

"I just hope she chooses to stay alive so we can properly introduce ourselves."

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And that's were I'm going to end it. Don't complain 'cause I was going to end it at the part where Cubmon says she might not want to live, so yeah. Please Review!


	8. Can't wake up

As a thanks for the reviews I updated sooner than I was planning to. I'm really glad people like this story! I always had high hopes for this story, thanks for not letting me down! I have something I need people to vote on... 

First, Should Jesse Live or Die...Review telling me what you want. Majority wins.  
Anyways on with the chapter!

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Last time:

"We finally found her."

"I just hope she chooses to stay alive so we can properly introduce ourselves."

Now:

"Well we bandaged her arms up. Now how are we suppose to get her back to her home in America?" Joe asked still kneeling next to Jesse.

Everyone looked at each other, no one had a clue.

"Maybe we should bring her to Japan with us to get her treated," Davis suggested.

"Yeah Davis and how are we suppose to explain that to her parents?" Tai said rolling his eyes.

"Hey at least I had a suggestion." Davis shot back. Before Tai could respond, Ken stepped in.

"Cubmon have you ever been to Jesse's home?" He asked quietly.

"Uh...Yeah, Why?"

"Using her digivice do you think you could get her home?"

"Oh I see where this is going!" Cubmon announced nodding.

"I don't," Davis muttered.

"Yeah I think I can get her home," Cub replied ignoring Davis.

"Good, then take her home, her dad should be able to find her, or at least I hope," Ken said.

"I'll leave now." Cubmon walked over to Jesse and took out her digivice. He held it up to the sky and to the other Digidestined amazement they disappeared.

"Why doesn't that work for us?" Davis cried out. The rest just rolled their eyes.

-Jesse's-

Cubmon, carefully, placed Jesse on her bed. He knew he had to leave before her dad came. He took one final look at her and hoped she would be ok. He disappeared back into the computer.

"Jesse are you in there?" Tom's voice filtered through the door, "I'm coming in we need to talk." Tom walked into the room and saw Jesse laying down on the bed. As he walked closer he saw the bandages.

"Oh no not again!" He shouted, "Jesse wake up." He tried to wake her up for about a minute before yelling down the steps for Elizabeth to call an ambulance.

-Jesse's mind-

'They're trying to help me as well...Why can't I wake up to tell them that I'm alright.'

_I will not allow you to do that, that is why._

Why!

_I want someone to keep me company, I've been alone for so long. I only wish you were more willing to stay here with me. You were willing not to long ago, not even a year ago. Now sleep for awhile, while I figure out what to do next._

-End Jesse's mind-

Tom, Elizabeth and Max all sat in a small room, in a hospital. Laying in a bed not even a foot away was Jesse. The doctors were stumped, all her vital signs were fine, they didn't know why she wouldn't wake up.

Tom and Elizabeth left the room to make some phone calls while Max remained there, sitting, watch the girl he thought of as a sister, lay there pale and dead-like.

"Why Jesse, Why did you do it...again. Don't you love me? I promise if you wake up, I'll never ever play another prank on you again. I'll be a good brother and I'll take care of you. I'll even talk to you if you need me. I'm sorry for ignoring you. Please wake up."

Max pleaded with half-dead girl.

-With Elizabeth and Tom-

"This is all my fault." Tom said quietly as they walked down the long white hallway.  
"Oh honey you can't blame yourself." Elizabeth tried to comfort her distressed husband.

"But it is my fault, I knew she was upset but I decided to let her have some time to cool off, I should've made her stay with me. I didn't even think. I never think about Jesse's feelings, work always came first. She told me that's why she was depressed in the first place. It was because I'm always working and usually ignore her. I never cared about her feeling on anything." Tom broke down crying. Elizabeth just stood there, holding her husband.

'Its also my fault,' She thought, 'I always took Max's side and I always assumed that I could take her mom's place. I never thought to get to know her and find some common ground. I always thought of her as a daughter but I never did anything to make her think of me as her mother.' Elizabeth sat there silently deep in her own pity.

-Jesse's mind-

'They love me! Please let me go! I want to be with my family and my...my friends.' Jesse stuttered over the word friends but she knew it was true. The Digidestined were her friends.

Ne_ver! Its not fair you get to be happy while I suffer._

'I thought you said you were apart of me.'

_I am!_

'So then aren't you happy if I'm happy? Or maybe its impossible for you to be happy and you want to drag me down with you.'

_Shut up you're annoying. I want you to sleep for a long time._

'Never!'

_You don't have a choice._

'No...' Jesse slowly started to sink deeper into the darkness.

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Sorry for the short chapter, but I need to know if Jesse should live or die before I can start the next one. I'll update no sooner than a week during that time I hope I'll get alot of reviews telling me what you want!


	9. The visit Part 1

Ok I got a total of one review saying if she should live or die. I said majority wins so I guess she'll live, unless more people review. This chapter is going to be short since it's a two part. Sorry! 

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After Tom recomposed himself, he went to the phone and called Japan.

"Moshi Moshi, Kamiya residence, Sonia speaking." Tai and Kari's Mother said answering.

"Hey Sonia, its Tom..."

"...Hello.."

"I'm calling to tell you that Jesse's in the hospital again. She tried to slit her wrists. It would mean a lot to her if you or the kids or even both would come and see her."

"How is she?" Sonia asked for once taking interest in her daughter.

"Stable though the doctors are baffled on why she won't wake up." He stated.

"I'll try to come." She said as she hung up.

"I hope you come this time," Tom whispered before calling other various relatives.

-Tai's house-

"Kids!" Mrs. Kamiya yelled. All the Digidestined out of Tai's room and into the living room, "I have some bad news. Your sister Jesse is in the hospital. We're going to America to see her."

"Can we all come?" Kari asked.

"Sure," She said. (That's going to cost a fortune.)

After contacting all their parents, the Digidestined were on their way to America.

"Hey Tai,"

"Yeah, Kari."

"So I was right, the girl in the digital world was our sister."

"I guess so,"

"No offense, but she's kind of creepy," Yolie said from two seats up.

"She had a hard life."

"I hope she wakes up when we get there. I want to meet her as my sister, not as another Digidestined." Kari said. Everyone grew quiet as the long flight continued.

-With Jesse's family-

Tom stood in Jesse's room holding her hand, "Guess what Jesse; your mom might come from Japan to see you. Isn't that great? I just hope you'll want to see her, too. I'm sorry for not listening to you. I promise I'll listen from now on. Just wake up, please."

-Jesse's Mind-

'She's coming to see me! My mother is coming all the way to America to see me! Please I beg you let me wake up.'

_NEVER!_

'I'll find a way to wake up, just you watch.'

_Good luck_

-End of Jesse's mind-

"Tom, Its time to leave. Visiting hours are over," Elizabeth said sadly, watching her husband.

"Ok," They walked out together. Max was already at home.

"So Jesse's mom might come to see her?"

"Yeah Sonia might come with the kids. Then you'll finally be able to meet Tai and Kari."

"Yes, that would be nice."

-With the Kamiya's-

"We have now arrived in New York, Enjoy your stay and thanks for flying." The attendant said as they got off the plane.

"Its too late to see her tonight, we'll go tomorrow," Mrs. Kamiya said as the rented a few hotel rooms to stay in.

Tomorrow they get to see their sister, again. Tomorrow...seemed like an eternity away.

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I told you it was short. Sorry! I'll get the next chapter up in a jiffy. Please review, the more reviews the faster I update. hehe


	10. The Visit Part 2

Hi everybody. I have a few things to say, first Thank you for reviewing! The votes are in and Jesse's going to live. Nobody wanted her to die, anyways. Second, I got a review asking for a ken Jesse pairing. I'm not sure if I can get that into this story, but I might make a sequel, if people want, and I'll put it into that one or at least try to. Third, for what I'm seeing now there's going to be about 2 or 3 more chapters. 

All in All review and tell me if you want a sequel or not.

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**-With the Kamiya's-**

"Everybody wake up," Tai's mom said as she called everybody's rooms on the phone, "Visitation hours start in an hour, lets see if you can get ready by then."

**-Tai, Matt, Davis, and Ken's room-**

"Davis wake up!" Ken shouted struggling to walk him up.

"Another 10 minutes mom," Davis mumbled rolling over.

"Here let me try," Matt said as he picked up a cup of ice cold water and threw on Davis's head.

"Holy Shit! I'm up, I'm up." Davis yelled as he ran around the room.

"Hurry up we only have 45 minutes to get ready now." Tai said as he changed clothes.

**-Kari, Mimi, Yolie, and Sora's room-**

"Mimi Hurry up." Sora muttered.

"I have to do my hair," Mimi whined.

"It looks fine," Kari said.

"Are you kidding me!"

"We only have a half hour before we need to meet in the lobby now hurry up." Sora said.

"Don't rush her it only makes matters worse." Yolie said.

"Yeah but I still need to get ready!" Sora announced.

"I'm hurrying!" Mimi said from the bathroom.

**-Joe, Cody, T.K and Izzy's room-**

"I can't find my hat!" T.K announced.

"Do you really need it?" Izzy muttered.

"Yes!"

"Well we have 15 minutes to search for it." Joe said.

"Found it." Cody mumbled

"We have to find it!" T.K shouted not hearing him.

"I said I found it!" Cody said louder.

"Hey Cody you found it, thanks." T.K said smiling.

"Can we get ready now?" Izzy asked.

"Hehe sure," T.K laughed.

**-The lobby-**

Surprisingly everyone got to the lobby on time. Well not everybody, Mrs. Kamiya wasn't there yet. Everyone sat down and talked about how their morning went. When Izzy told them how T.K couldn't find his hat, Matt shook his head. They all rolled their eyes when Sora told them Mimi wouldn't get out of the bathroom, and everyone laughed, except Davis, when Matt said that he threw cold water on Davis to wake him up. Even with everyone laughing, they were all still nervous. What kind of condition was Jesse in? Is she awake or not? Mrs. Kamiya finally arrived and their questions were about to be answered as they left the hotel and went to the hospital.

**-With the Toki family-**

Tom, Elizabeth and Max all sat in the car.

"So, Jesse's other family is coming?" Max asked.

"I'm not sure, but I believe so." Tom answered.

"I hope they don't, I don't wanna meet them." Max announced.

"Max!" Elizabeth said surprised.

"What? They're the reason Jesse's like this." Max muttered.

"Max, you behave yourself today if they come, you understand." Elizabeth commanded sternly.

"Yes mom," Max whispered, 'But I still don't like them.' he thought.

**-Kamiya family-**

They all got out of the car and entered the hospital. Since they didn't know what room Jesse was in and the lady at the front desk wasn't there, they had to wait for Tom and his family to get there.

"Hey Kari, Can you believe we're going to see Dad again?" Tai whispered.

"I know." Kari whispered back, "Do you think we'll be able to recognize him?"

Tai just shrugged. He really couldn't answer. He looked up when he heard the front doors open and a man, woman, and young boy walk in.

"Hello Tom," Sonia said politely.

"Sonia," He acknowledged before turning to the kids, "Tai, Kari its great to see you again."

"Hi," They both said. Everyone was quiet for a few minutes, nobody knew what to say.

"Oh this is my wife, Elizabeth, and my stepson Max, he's twelve." Tom told them.

"These are our friends from Japan. Their names are Matt, T.K, Sora, Mimi, Joe, Izzy, Cody, Yolie, Ken, and Davis," Tai said pointing to them as he named them.

"Well I'm sure Jesse would love to meet them. If you follow me, I'll show you to her room." Tom said walking with Elizabeth behind him. Max started to walk in front of the group but not before giving them an evil glare.

"I don't think he likes us," Kari muttered.

The others shrugged as they followed Tom to the room Jesse's staying in. Max got in front of his dad and walked into the room as Tom stopped and looked at everybody.

"I have to explain a few things. Jesse hasn't woken up yet. The doctors say that she's stable but they can't figure out why she won't open her eyes. She had cut herself thirteen times, seven on one arm and six on the other," Tom explained, "Other than that you can go in and see her if you'd like."

"I'll be back," Elizabeth announced quietly as she walked away.

"We'll go in now," Tai said as he and the others walked into the room. (How they all fit, they still don't know.) He noticed Max sitting in a chair, holding one of Jesse's hands.  
They all gathered around Jesse quietly. Kari wanted to say something to break the silence but she didn't have to 'cause just then Max spoke.

"This is all your fault," Max whispered accusingly. They were all surprised by the boy's harsh words, but he wasn't finished yet.

"Since Jesse was 9 she's been trying to call you. She would try at least twice a day, but no one ever answered. She'd leave messages that no one would return. It killed her inside, she felt betrayed. See every since my mom married her dad I saw her as a sister. I always looked up to her, I wanted to do what she did." He smiled at the thought, " I was always jealous, She only wanted you guys as her sibling, not me.

"When I was ten and Jesse was twelve our parents left for the night. They went to some dance or something. I asked her if she wanted to play with me and she said in the deadest sounding tone I've ever heard, no. That's when I realized the change in my sister. Her eyes were dead, she wore almost all black, her voice was as dark as her clothes. Later that night we were watching TV when she turned to me and asked if I cared about her. As a younger brother you don't tell your sister that you care so of course I said no, why would I like you, eww that's gross. She simply nodded and turned back to the TV. That was the start of her depression.

"6 months ago, My parents went to a party at a friends house. Once again they left Jesse and me home alone. That night, it was quiet, usually me and Jesse would fight. I went up to Jesse's room to see how badly I could bug her, but when I opened the door, she was half-gone. I remember running to the phone and nothing else. The doctors said that physically she would heal but she was emotionally dead. I tried so hard to bring her back to life and yet I was afraid of her, when she needed me most I was afraid of her!" Max started to cry, "When I found her in her room that time, she was still talking, and all I heard was they hate me, they ignore me, they don't care, that's all I heard! I blame you! All I wanted was a sister, and you killed her!"

**-Jesse's mind-**

'What? I never knew. Oh Max, I didn't mean to hurt you. Please let me out, He needs me!'

_No, don't you want them to suffer as you suffered._

'Not Max, he doesn't deserve it.' Jesse cried.

**-End Jesse's Mind-**

Tai was just about to answer, when he looked at Jesse's face, "She's crying."

"What?" Max said astonished as he looked at Jesse's face as well, "Dad come here!"

**-In the hall during this time-**

Tom and Sonia sat in a very uncomfortable silence in the hall. Its been eleven years since they've seen each other and they were both hoping it would be longer. Both were leaning against a wall opposite of each other. Sonia finally couldn't take the silence anymore.

"So, You're married," She could have smacked herself for that but she needed to end the silence around them.

"Yeah, How about you?"

"Hai, I mean Yeah."

Tom chuckled, "At least it seems we've grown up in the last eleven years."

"How so?"

"Don't you remember, We couldn't be in the same room without screaming at each other about something. Look at us now, trying to have a civilized conversation."

"You might have grown up but I haven't. I've wasted the last eleven years ignoring this side of my life instead of trying to accept it. I've ignored Jesse instead of trying to get to know her, because of my own fears. Because of my own stupid insecurities."

"You matured. It takes a lot to say you were wrong or afraid. Back then neither of us would ever admit to being wrong. We'd go around with this false pride and security waiting for the other one to crack. That's why we didn't work out in the end. Both of us had to much pride and not enough guts to admit our fears."

"Sounds like you thought about this for a long time."

"I did, I wasn't going to make the same mistake a second time." Tom smirked, "We grew up and now maybe we could start over as friends instead of ex's."

"For the kids sake at least." Sonia finished smiling. The sat in a more comfortable silence this time for a few minutes before they heard Max yell from the room for them to come quick. When they came into the room, they stopped astonished. It seemed that Jesse was waking up.

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Sorry but that's the chapter. The more reviews I get, the quicker I update so think about it and review. Don't forget to review about the sequel thing, too. 'Till Next time!


	11. Back to the past

First off, I would like to apologize for not updating sooner. I had a few things…stopping me from writing the next chapter to this story. To let you know I will continue writing now, oh and I got a new computer and I'm beginning to think the Microsoft Word is better. I really hope you like this chapter and I'm still debating on whether or not to have a sequel.

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**-Jesse's mind-**

Jesse had to break away from the depths of her own mind. She finally figured out how to escape, but it meant coming to terms with her past, and she didn't know if she was strong enough.

After speaking with the voice in her head and contemplating the answers she received from it, she decided the voice was indeed a part of her. A part, she refused to talk about, the darkness inside. The reason for her scars. In order to save herself, she would have to re-live her hate-filled past.

That led to another conflict, just because she came to terms with herself, didn't mean anything would change. Did she really want to struggle to live, only to wake up and be reminded why she wanted to die? Sure, they felt bad now, but how long would it be until things go back to before? Was she really that willing to fight through her own hell, only to take the chance of ending there again?

Yes. She is willing to fight for the slight chance of things changing. She would never forgive herself if she didn't try. Deciding on this, she stood up and closed her eyes, focusing on her memories. 'I will beat you,' she thought opening her eyes.

"Back to the past," She mumbled closing her eyes again. "I need to go back to the past. Re-live the memories I long forgot and hate."

The next time she opened her eyes, she was in her house. She felt a sticky, warm liquid on both of her arms. She looked down at her wrists, confirming her thoughts, her wrists were slit open. She was in the memory of when she had just tried to commit suicide. 'I guess I had to start somewhere…' She thought sadly, 'Oh shit!' She remembered that she was bleeding…To death! Moving quickly she wrapped her arms in tissues to stop the bleeding.  
'This is no good. All this showed was me trying to die, nothing about my pain throughout it. I needed to go back farther, To the beginning.' She thought before once again closing her eyes.

"Take me back farther, to the beginning." She said

"You'll never defeat me," The voice whispered.

"Oh but I will." She said confidently, eyes still closed. If they were open, she would've seen herself with bloody arms and blazing eyes staring back at her.

Jesse opened her eyes. She was standing in front of her dad who had his arm around Elizabeth. Jesse looked at herself. She was back in time when she was 6, she looked up when her dad started to talk.

"Jesse, this is Elizabeth. She's going to be your new mommy."

'I don't understand. I don't want a new mommy. I have a mommy, she's not here right now but she'll be back, she promised.' Jesse felt herself thinking, 'Daddy looks happy though. He hasn't been happy in a long time. I guess I'll keep quiet for now.'

Jesse shook her head as a child she had been very observant. She remembered how sad her dad had been and how she couldn't seems to figure out where her mom was. When Dad first introduced Elizabeth to her, she was confused. She was sure her mom was coming back. Though she felt angry that her dad had called Elizabeth her new mom she couldn't yell at him. She just wanted him to happy and she bared her pain and confusion in silence.  
'My first mistake,' She realized. Her father never asked her how she felt about Elizabeth, but then again, she never asked him what was going on. She was only 6, her Dad probably thought she was too young to understand. She bit her lip as she was transported into a new memory.

An 8 year old Jesse sat on her front porch with her new birthday present. Her Dad gave her a soccer ball, since she loved soccer and wanted to be just like Tai. Her Dad came out of the house dressed in a suit and tie.

"Daddy will you play soccer with me!" Jesse asked enthusiastically.

"Sorry honey, Not right now, daddy has to work. I'll play with you tonight, ok."

"Ok daddy."

'Liar,' She thought sadly. 'I remember this. Dad said he'd play with me but when he got home he said he was too tired to play and he'd play tomorrow. Later on that night, I watched him play video games with my step-brother, Max and the pain in my chest wouldn't go away. He never did play soccer with me.'

'I never asked if I could join. I felt betrayed and I ran to my room and stayed in there until morning. Then I pretended like nothing had happened. My second mistake.'

The next memory took place a year later, when Jesse was 9. She was crying her eyes out because she wanted to talk to her mom but Elizabeth said no. Jesse thought she was trying to be mean and called her anyways. Nobody answered.

'And nobody ever would,' Jesse thought, 'Elizabeth knew and she was trying to protect me, but I was too selfish and angry to listen. I never told dad that I tried to call, mom. I thought he was trying to keep me away from her, too. I never knew the truth until later on.'

A twelve year old Jesse sat on her bed with a knife in her hand. Blood ran down her arm as she watched it silently. Her parents were at a dance. She had to watch Max again. They treat her more like a baby-sitter than a daughter. She was always watching Max. Hearing a knock on her door she rolled down her sleeve quickly. Max walked in and asked her if she wanted to play with him. Yes she wanted to play with him but she couldn't bring herself to say yes. Instead she scared him away by saying no in an eerie voice. She wanted so bad to love him, but her heart hurt to much. She hated him, because he could still smile.

She walked downstairs and watched T.V for awhile. Later on her brother joined her. 'If I did die, would anyone care? Do they love me?'

"Max," She said quietly, "Do you care about me."

"What? No, Eww why would I like you, that's gross."

She nodded, "I understand." and turned back to the T.V.

"I've seen enough," I've concurred re-lived my past now let me out."

"You still have one more, Jesse."

"What?"

Jesse appeared back in her room with the knife on the bathroom floor. Blood oozed out of self-inflicted wounds. 'I already live through this!'

"Not completely."

Jesse looked around her. She was in the hospital. She pulled back startled when she saw herself laying in a bed. 'What's going on?'

"Look what all happened while you were asleep."

She turned to see Max crouched against a wall with Elizabeth talking to him.

"Max, what did Jesse say to you? Why would you tell us?"

"It doesn't matter anyways, Mom. She's dead."

"She not dead yet, Max!"

"No, she's dead. Not physically no, but Emotionally she's been dead for years. I should have seen it. Its all my fault, I knew, but I didn't say anything. I can't even look at her anymore, mom. I feel too ashamed."

"Its not your fault," Tom said coming into the room. Jesse stopped listening.  
'So he blamed himself for her death-attempt, but why? Why did he care so much.' She thought, 'Because he did care about me, is that the answer. Well then I'm not going to let him fight this alone! I'm going back whether you like it or not!'

"NOOOOO!"

The darkness around her faded. She could see a light. She was going home and she will make everything better.

"She's waking up!" Somebody said as Jesse opened her eyes.

"Hey Max," She whispered quietly.

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Sorry to end it like that. The next chapter is the last one! I can't wait! YesI Know this chapter was extremely short, SORRY! 


	12. Sucky chapter End

Guess what everyone this is the last chapter! I can hardly believe it. I like to thank everyone who reviewed to this story. I know this chapter is short and pointless and i apologize i'm not good at endings.

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"Hey Max," Jesse said quietly as she opened her eyes

"Hey Jess," Max answered looking into her eyes for the first time in years.

She looked at her arms and then back at Max, "I made a mistake…..I can't do anything right, can I?" Jesse laughed dryly.

"We all make some mistakes, yours just happen to be the kind that leaves scars. Can I talk to Jesse alone for a minute?" Max asked looking at everyone. Tom nodded and pushed everyone out the door, "I have to tell the doctor she's awake, anyways."

After everyone was gone, Jesse spoke again, "Its not your fault, you know. I couldn't have stopped me the first time."

"I should have saw it. You asked….You asked if I cared about you and I said no. I said no when I should've said yes."

"I knew. When you said no I knew you did care but my mind wouldn't let me believe it but I knew. This are going to be better this time, Max. I found my peace."

"Was that what you were doing? When you wouldn't wake up, were you finding yourself?"

"Yeah, I wont make the same mistake again. As long as I have you, Elizabeth and Dad. I'll be fine."

"They're here?"

"Who?"

"Tai, and Kari."

"I know. I don't know how but I know."

"She's here too," Max added quietly.

Jesse's eyes widened. She didn't know her mom had come as well, "I see. Did dad invite her here?"

"Yeah."

Jesse nodded. A doctor walked in and asked Max to leave while he did a check up for Jesse.

"Hey Max."

"What?" He asked as he walked out the door.

"Love ya."

"Right back at ya." Max smiled before walking out the door leaving Jesse with the doctor. The doctor did a throughout scan. He checked her arms and looked at her disapproving. Jesse sighed same old same old. It was the same doctor as last time. A few minutes later he walked out and talked to her parents.

Jesse sat in the room bored. She remembered the voice in her head, 'Was it just a dream or did it really happen,' she thought. In her heart she knew it was no dream.

"Hey Jesse," A voice said snapping her out of her thoughts. Jesse looked up to see the Digidestined there.

"Hey. I guess the truth comes out. I'm sorry for lying to you. I just didn't want to tell you. I thought you hated me." Jesse looked down she couldn't look at their faces.

"Its ok, Jesse. We understand completely. Don't worry about it." Kari said.

"Thanks," Jesse smiled, a real smile, "So what did the doctor say, therapy again."

"Yep."

"Damn that psychiatrist."

Kari shook her head, laughing, "I'm guessing you don't like her."

"She has one too many screws loose in her head. The whole time I was there she talked about imagining balls of light that can heal. I was like I'm imagining using a screwdriver to screw your head back together."

"Maybe you can go to a different psychiatrist." Yolie suggested

"Not likely."

"Don't go back to that pessimistic attitude! You got to see the bright things in life. And after you get completely better we can be friends and partners right?" Davis asked

"Right. You're a good guy Davis." Jesse stated.

"Thanks I try," Davis laughed, rubbing the back of his head.

"We should leave your dad and umm…your dad wants to talk to you." Tai said, "We'll talk later."

"Ok," After they left she sighed. Everybody was coming to see her and it was getting old real fast. Her father came in next and basically asked how she was and crap like that, apologizing a thousand times for not being there her. Jesse just wanted to sleep again. After her dad and Elizabeth left, she laid back.

"Jesse," A small voice called from the door. Jesse looked up and her breathe caught in her throat. Her mother, whom she hasn't seen in years, was standing in the doorway.

"M..Mom?" Jesse whispered, not trusting her voice.

"I'm sorry Jesse I'm so sorry. When I look at you I see all the things I've been missing over the years and it makes me feel so horrible."

"Stop, I get it. You were afraid, everyone is. It was a long distance and it was difficult. I'm finally getting it. I found my peace and I hope you can find yours."

"I'll be looking for it," Sonia said laughing and Jesse laughed right along with her, "I better let you rest. We'll talk later, this time I'm keeping my promise."

Sonia walked out and Jesse fell asleep. Three days later Jesse got to go home and she started therapy, with a different therapist this time. Tom spent more time at home, and Sonia called once a week, at least. Max and Jesse got along a lot better and they finally understood each other. Things were finally looking up for Jesse.

"Max, give me the remote!" Jesse yelled chasing Max around the living room.

"Quit it you two," Elizabeth called from the kitchen though you could hear her laughing. Jesse crossed her arms and glared at Max.

"You look funny in Pink!" Max called as he ran into the kitchen. Jesse frowned and looked down at her clothes. She wore a dark pink t-shirt with khaki's on. A week after getting out of the hospital, Elizabeth took her shopping to get new clothes. They brought her old clothes to good will. I'm not sure what they would do with all that black.

"Max if you don't get back here right now, I'll murder you!"

"Come and Catch me!" Max called running. Jesse took off after him and they rolled to the ground wrestling. Jesse finally got the remote.

"I'll get it next time," Max threatened.

"Yeah right," Jesse teased.

"Jesse," Her father called, "If you want to practice then get out here."

Jesse ran outside. She joined the soccer team at school and her dad decided to start practicing with her.

"Ready," her dad asked.

"Your going down old man!" Jesse shouted laughing. Tom laughed and the game began. Jesse finally got to play Soccer with her dad. Max and Elizabeth joined in the fun.

End

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Yes there will be a sequel. I hope you enjoyed this story. Here's my thanks to everyone who reviewed, no matter how many times. No matter what they said…  
Ashykia  
Birdboy  
Wizzie  
Just a reviewer  
Dr.D76567  
Simply just being  
kurama and hieis girl  
Gizmo-396  
Twilight Falcon  
Xxnewmikexx  
digifan3035  
Seal-chan  
Shinsei Tsukiko

Oh I have a few more things to say. I, especially, want to thank Shinsei Tsukiko, thanks for the flame I used it to make s'mores. Don't say crap about the story when you only read the first chapter how do you know it's a Mary-sue from one chapter! I would never delete a review no matter what it said unless it had a ton of swearing in it then maybe just maybe I would delete it. By saying you can't believe people gave me good reviews is both insulting to me and my reviewers. That's just rude!

The sequel to this story might take awhile but I'll get it up. Thanks for giving this story a chance!


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